Seasoned role players can always tell who the “new people” are when they enter the Dungeon or show up at a sex club. It isn’t just that they have a new face… it’s so much more than that. Many think they are being sexy by wearing revealing clothing on a frigid evening when they could have checked their coat upon arrival and avoided hypothermia. Some think they can substitute bravado for a lack of experience and are eager to volunteer for every activity, no matter how extreme it may be… or how ill-prepared they may be for the outcome.
Everyone is best served if the kinksters gathering for a scene take a moment to become properly prepared in advance of the event. Some of it is as simple as making sure you take the time to stretch properly. The strain of stress positions can be every bit as muscle-cramping as any athletic event, and often even more so. Do your body a big favor and hydrate, limber up, and learn your physical limits so that you can enjoy yourself and be enjoyed by others without interruptions.
Always check in with the dungeon master or floor manager when you arrive. Responsible play often includes a questionnaire for new role players and gives you a chance to mention that gimpy ankle from a skiing accident a few years ago, or your hard limits about anything.
As a final note, if you ever visit a play space of any kind and people attempt to play with you before establishing a credible safe word. Leave. Don’t correct them, don’t linger, don’t take unnecessary risks… just quietly excuse yourself and go home. There are plenty of places to play, and you can find many of them online by visiting BDSMdate.com. It takes much less time to find a great place to play than it would ever take to overcome injuries or the emotional scars of unsafe scenes that are poorly planned!
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