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Planning Tips for BDSM Role Plays

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As someone who loves role playing with my lovers, I’ve realized that a little planning goes a long way to making your scene the most it can be. When I first starting exploring role playing, I would just spontaneously go into character during sex. For example, if my lover suggested spanking, and I would assume the voice of a schoolgirl and tell him that I hadn’t done my homework. Don’t get me wrong, spontaneity is a wonderful thing in the bedroom, but the more I become interested in role playing, the more I want to make it seem real.

Tips for Planning a BDSM Role Play

1. Develop your Roles. In my current relationship, I’m the take charge one who likes to set the scene, even though I always play the submissive. Sometimes I even write a small paragraph about the characters and the scene to send to my lover beforehand, so he has time to develop in his mind who he is and what might happen. This type of preparation really helps to build anticipation!

2. Use Costumes and Accessories. This might be the most fun part of getting ready for a scene. Like me, you probably have items in your wardrobe that you can already use. Or if you want to invest, you can find sexy shops that sell kinky costumes for different themes. You can shop the Kink Lovers store for toys and accessories, or look around the house for suitable props (e.g. ropes and ties can be used for handcuffs, the back of a hairbrush for a spanking paddle.)

3. Stay in Character. If you’re just beginning to role play, it can seem awkward and you might want to burst out laughing at times, but the more you can commit to your role, the more intense it will feel. Sometimes I role play on my own to practice certain lines I want to say that I know will turn my lover on. The only reason to break out of your character should be to use a safe word or when the scene naturally ends.

4. Be Open and Go with the Flow. Even if you’ve planned a scene and have an idea how you would like it to transpire, you have to be open to wherever it goes, otherwise you’ll get stuck. This is especially important for submissives to remember, as a dominant will likely want to control the action to a certain degree. When you’re open, amazing things are bound to happen!

5 Red Hot Role Plays

How much planning do you put into your role playing?

Tell us what you think!

Tell us what you think!

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