Just the Tips

Are They Whores, Skanks, Cunts, Twats, Ladies or Dykes?

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When it comes to kink, almost no word is ever forbidden but it’s important to know your audience before choosing the right terminology for any scene play. Names and games can be so subjective, and a girl who loves being called a cunt may for whatever reason find the term twat to be totally off-putting.

In a casual conversation away from the dungeon, during aftercare or before a scene together it’s really vital for participants to feel each other out and establish boundaries. Many make the mistake of thinking that this only applies to physical limits but it should go much deeper on an emotional level. You want to conjure the right memories and emotions from the people you role play with, not bring up their biggest turn-offs or take them back to a state of mind that they want to avoid at all costs.

Simply asking if a particular term excites them is as easy as finding out if they enjoy having their hair pulled or have an issue with play that leaves physical marks as evidence of their activities. The more you know, the better you can hone your skills and plan your activities for each fantasy session.

Often a phrase like “Slut, pick up that bucket of cum and feed it to that other sub” is just as powerful and much more palatable to your playmates than “Cunt, remember that time your boyfriend abused you and had you drink all that cum, let’s do the same thing to that sub over there together!”

It’s so easy to get what you want in a BDSM play setting without taking away what someone else wants from them in the same scene. Showing a devotion to the greater enjoyment of everyone involved isn’t just altruistic nonsense, it’s also the easiest way to keep your playmates cumming back for more every time they find out you are in attendance!

How do you negotiate names and terms used in your bdsm scenes?

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