If you haven’t heard of edging or orgasm denial, you might be wondering why the heck someone would ever deny themselves or a lover this ultimate explosion of pleasure.
But that’s what makes sex so exciting—the infinite ways that we can explore our limits and boundaries, and new ways to play together, or solo. That’s what kink lovers do!
What Is Orgasm Denial?
The term explains itself for the most part—you are denying yourself an orgasm, during masturbation or with a partner. It’s all about being in control of when or if you or your lover comes.
Edging is a technique used to describe being brought to the edge of orgasm and then pulling back or being denied from climaxing.
Some kinky couples use complete orgasm denial along with chastity play. Others will tease and titillate a partner to prolong things as a way to make an orgasm more explosive. The other side of this coin is the practice of forced orgasms.
Orgasm denial might be something a Dom uses to punish their submissive, letting them edge as close to orgasm as possible before cutting the play off completely. There are many ways to play with orgasm torture and denial!
8 Orgasm Denial Games
1. Chastity + Porn
This is a great solo orgasm denial game but can be adjusted for two.
Try watching kinky porn scenes, what gets you turned on the most. But keep your hands away from your junk as long as possible, even when your cock stands to attention and starts to drip its precum.
With two, your lover can tie you up and force you to watch, deciding how much attention they will give you and your throbbing member, pulling back over and over.
Read: Teasing, Orgasm Denial, and Chastity Play
2. Oral Only
Oral sex is often only used as foreplay, but when you know it’s the only play on the table, it changes the game. Every lick or suck or nibble she offers can be devastatingly delicious when you’re on the edge of coming.
If you’re afraid you won’t be able to handle not touching yourself, then she might have to tie you up or vice versa. So much about sexual control is in our minds, but physical denial adds another level of dominance to the scene.
3. Timed Release
Get out your stopwatch, smartphone, or kitchen timer, and let the games begin. You might tell your partner that they’re only allowed to come when the timer goes off—that might be fifteen minutes, a half hour, one hour, or maybe two.
This game adds an expectation and builds a particular kind of tension, especially if you set an orgasm deadline—if they don’t come at the prescribed time, they are denied completely. This is a very good game for D/s couples.
4. Rewards Program
For 24-hour D/s couples, you may want to start a gold-star system that only rewards an orgasm when your lover has received a certain number of stars on the scoreboard.
What the sub receives gold stars for is up to the dom. It could be anything from housework to errands to performance to obedience. And how many stars equals an orgasm is also part of the game. Subservient behavior may also result in the loss of stars.
Read: Tips and Tricks for Chastity Sessions
5. Stop and Go
Remember the game red-light green-light? Bring this childhood favorite into your bedroom for some adult fun. Allow your partner only to touch themselves with the command of “green light” and when you see them inching closer to orgasm, call out “red light.” This can go on for as long as you want.
Read: Orgasm Torture Tips for BDSM Couples
6. Bondage + Sensory
You are really in charge when you have a lover bound. Add a blindfold and sensation play, and orgasm denial is just waiting to happen!
The anticipation goes through the roof when they don’t know what or when you are about to give them the attention they increasingly crave. They may beg and plead for more, but pulling back every time they get close to climax will be rewarding if and when you allow them to get there.
Read: 4 Sexy Ideas for Blindfold Fun
7. Roll the Dice
If you’re new to orgasm denial, start with one. Roll the die and whatever number comes up will be the amount of times that you or your partner will be edged. The orgasm can be denied completely if you both agree. Too easy? Roll two and really go the distance. Box cars will bring you to the brink twelve times—can you handle that? You’ll find out soon enough!
8. CBT-Infused Edging
If she’s the domme in the relationship, she’ll likely deny your orgasm with a little slap or squeeze of your cock while edging for good measure. Only bad boys come too soon or not when they’re told to.
If you do come without permission, there may be some cock and ball torture waiting as punishment. Who knows, she may put your cock in a chastity cage for a time so you can’t sneak a session in behind her back.
Read: The Ins and Ouch of Cock and Ball Torture
What’s your go-to game for orgasm denial with your kinky lover? Dare to share?
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