Myths are created and perpetuated by people that are not informed about a particular subject. Before meeting a dominatrix, fetish enthusiasts, and dungeon operators, I had preconceived notions myself. What can be done to dispel these myths? Talking to people within the bdsm community, educating ourselves, and discussing our feelings and thoughts about it all. Here are the most common bdsm myths that I continue to hear.
BDSM Myths
1. The lifestyle is deviant. Bdsm is about people exploring their bodies and preferences. Being comfortable with one’s body is at the core and is part of healthy relationships. The lifestyle does not try to hide itself and is open to everyone interested.
2. It’s all about sex. Many who participate in the bdsm community do not engage sexually. Dominance and submission can be normal aspects of a relationship and only entail a psychological partnership.
3. Bdsm is dangerous. Safe practice is always stressed in the community. This includes the use of safe words such as red for stop and yellow for slow down. Consent, trust, and respect are present in true bdsm relationships; no one wants to force you to do something which you are uncomfortable with.
4. Only freaks engage in bdsm. If this is true, then we’re all freaks. Every walk of life engages and participates in bdsm activities. People of different culture, social status, ability, age, and class are participating.
5. Submissives are weak and dominants are selfish. A submissive gives up control because they want to. Subs often have careers that are filled with control and bdsm is a way for them to feel free. True dominants cherish and care for their submissives. Goals include wanting their sub to grow and face fears in a safe environment. A lasting sub dom relationship requires a deep love and commitment to one another.
What other bdsm myths are out there? How do you dispel these myths?
Tell us what you think