There are lots of good reasons most women, even kinky ones, don’t let you fist them. The risk of pain and damage is high, and there is zero pleasure if it’s not done right.
Fisting a woman and being fisted as part of BDSM, submission, orgasm denial, pussy worship, and more, can be an intimate, bonding, loving, pleasurable, rewarding act. Because of the dangers, many of us deny ourselves this amazing experience.
The right partner who is patient and knowledgeable can make the experience downright cosmic. Here are the things you should know.
It’s not a quickie.
The thought of pushing your whole hand into a woman is a giant turn on, but you don’t “just do it.” It’s a lengthy process because her vagina needs to be warmed up and stretched.
Yes, a woman gives birth to a watermelon, but it doesn’t just plop on out. Labor takes hours, even days. Muscles contract. Hormones ignite.
Your fist is not quite that big, but you have to warm up those muscles with heat and blood flow, and arouse her to the brink of madness first.
You may have seen a fist go in easily in porn, then pumped hard. NO, NO, NO. You don’t want to rupture or tear anything. The woman in the film was prepped behind the scenes, or maybe, god forbid, she had no choice. You don’t just shove it in, and you don’t pump it hard. Ever.
Fisting is all about her.
Even if you are the master, and she the slave, when it comes to fisting, it’s still all about her. You don’t bark orders that she let you in. If she’s serving you, it’s by granting you entry, so honor that.
You might want to pounce, you might want her to suck your dick, you might have a rock-hard erection driving you batty. You must put all of that aside to focus on the process and her body.
Watch a lesbian/bisexual fisting video.
Most women I know who have been fisted have done so with female partners, not men. If that makes sense to you, you’re thinking in the right direction.
Fisting is a work of patience and sensuality. It’s about opening her up like a flower, not forcing your hand in. Lessons from women are going to be the most helpful.
It’s not a fist, it’s a bird beak.
You won’t actually be making a fist and expecting that to work. You’ll be using multiple fingers and then bunching your fingers up together while pointing them, kind of like a beak.
Get good lube, and use lots of it.
Putting a shower curtain or other plastic barrier underneath her is a good idea to help her relax, because she’s going to need a lot of lubrication and doesn’t want to worry about the mattress, sheets, or carpet.
Many women will also urinate, a little or a lot, and sometimes ejaculate. Let it happen. A handy towel and a protective sheet underneath will make her more comfortable.
Renew the lubrication throughout the process.
Intercourse is really hot when you know it’s not the end game.
Usually the fucking is the pinnacle or object. Through all kinds of touches or kinky games, the ultimate is the final goal—you entering me. Getting penetrated with your cock is really what it’s all about. It’s why we’re doing everything we’re doing.
Except, when it isn’t.
Learning to fist a woman properly means that sometimes the fucking is about warming her up and getting her going. It’s so exciting when you penetrate me, but we both know there’s another level up ahead.
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