Best BDSM Dating Sites

For the readers at KinkLovers, BDSM Date is the most popular dating site for those interested in bdsm and fetish. However, there are many other sites in this niche that are also great for making new connections and meeting women and men in the lifestyle.

All of the bdsm dating sites below offer a free basic membership which allows you to sign up and check out the profiles and available features before upgrading. I usually advise people to join a few sites at a time and then only pay for the one or two that have lots of local profiles.

Lola Recommends…

BDSMDate.com

This is not only the largest bdsm dating site (by far), but also the most fully featured. BDSM Date offers video chat, instant messaging, and member blogs, and the group chat rooms are totally free for basic members (those who haven’t upgraded yet). The search function allows you to find people into your specific fetish or interest so hooking up with like-minded members is easy. If you haven’t joined yet be sure to check it out. You may get an upgrade screen after signing up but you can easily bypass this to explore the site before even considering a more deluxe membership level.

BDSMSingles.com

Read our full BDSM Singles Review.
This is a lesser known site but has a good number of profiles after being in the game for well over a decade. Some of the advanced features could be improved (such as allowing member to member video chat) but one key benefit here is that you can view profiles and play their tinder-like game of “hot or not” without upgrading. This gives you a chance to see who’s near you and ready to play, but I do recommend the full membership for when you want to contact someone to set up a date.

FindaFemdom.com

Read our FindaFemdom Review.
The name says it all! I like this site as well because you can sign up for free and take a look at all of their members. You’ll find thousands of people in the bdsm lifestyle here including local femdoms and dominant women. New members get 30 free “Flirts” (ice breakers), so you can start interacting right away and get a feel for the community before deciding to upgrade.

For more bdsm dating sites related to individual fetishes, see my post: Best Fetish Dating Sites For Every Kink

Others Sites that are popular among Kink Lovers readers:

FindaThreesome.com

While it’s not specifically a site for BDSM, Find a Threesome is a huge site with over 70 million members to date. People from all over the world use FindaThreesome.com to meet both couples and singles for kinky group fun. If threesomes are your thing, be sure to check out our post about the Best Threesome Dating Sites.

StraponDating.com

What can I say? The strapon fantasy is alive and well and some of the most popular posts here at KinkLovers revolve around pegging and where to meet potential partners. No need to wade through the general BDSM population, just go straight to the source with Strapon Dating, the site for women with strapons and the guys who want to bend over for them.  Read more on Pegging & Strapon Dating Sites.

Honorable Mention

You may have come across some other BDSM hookup sites that promise the opportunity to meet doms and subs online. Alt.com is a massive player, but I didn’t mention them above as they share the same database as BDSMDate.com. I had a few free options listed here as well but have since removed them as I received so many negative comments about them. In lieu of those recommendations I’ve added to the the sub-niche sites for those with particular kinks such as group and strapon hookups.

A lot changes in this online dating space, very quickly. I try to keep things as current as possible and do update this list when I can. If you see something different on one of these sites to what has been written about them in our dating site reviews, please let us know in the comments of that particular post. I will do my best to correct any details that may have changed.

Good Luck and Enjoy!

KinkLovers.com is the blog for men and women into BDSM, bondage, fetishes, and dating. We post tips and advice for those interested in meeting other kinky singles with online dating, or anyone who wants to spice up their relationship. Enter the world of Kink Lovers with exclusive articles, polls, site reviews, reader stories and more. If you would like to subscribe to our blog updates which are sent only twice monthly, please subscribe to our newsletter using the form above.

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