Some of you kinky guys looking for a love connection through online dating might be wondering if a match is even possible. Is there really a woman out there who is as excited by you in diapers as you are by wearing them? Do any ladies want to hear your fantasies about the Eiffel Tower? Is there a special someone who will not just entertain your desire to be disciplined, but get turned on too?
I believe in something for everyone, that no desire is too obscure to indulge. That doesn’t mean it’s easy to find a playmate. Even folks with no special requests—Man seeking Woman, 18 to 99—can have a hard time finding the right fit. But you’ve got to put yourself out there and stay positive!
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It’s true that some fetishes are rare, specific, and not shared by women. But that doesn’t mean impossible, so don’t give up! And if your kink falls into the following categories, you will have no problem finding women who share your dreams. Here are a few common kinks among us ladies.
BDSM
Tie me up, tie me down! Whether you’re looking for a slave or a master, whether you want to restrain or be restrained, you might have an easier time finding a fantasy mate than if you had no penchant for power whatsoever. The raging popularity of recent BDSM novels blew the lid off women’s secret fantasies, but it should have been no surprise: every generation has new novels about bondage or S&M that women gobble up like chocolate. Remember Anne Rice’s erotic novels, or the Story of O?
Women find power dynamics as thrilling in the bedroom as you do. Some want to wield the whip and be worshipped, some want the catharsis of controlling you, and some of us find that both sides of the equation can rock our worlds.
Fancy Footwork
One of the most common kinks is the foot fetish. Some women find it arousing to have their feet tickled, licked, massaged, oiled, washed, and worshipped, making her the perfect recipient of your affections. But you are more likely to find the right fit for another reason—women have a thing for shoes.
It’s not the same as it is for men—few of us sniff guy’s sneakers or privately hump your piles of dirty socks. But if shoes are part of the fantasy, she’ll be there!
Some studies show that women find new shoes more exciting than sex. So with a bit of imagination and some fancy footwork, you can find a loving home for this common fetish. Trust me, if you’re taking a keen interest in her shoe wardrobe, you’ll be rewarded. Lavish her with stiletto shoes and Jimmy Choos and she won’t want to take them off, not even in bed. It’s as perfect a kink match as you can find. If the shoe fits, wear it!
Group Sex
These kinks are not necessarily the same but they can overlap. Yes, men are often the initiators of expanding the horizon and inviting others into a couple’s bed. But women are often pleasantly surprised to find the more the merrier. It makes total sense—the most commonplace desire among all of us is “to have sex with someone.” No one dreams of only one person naked, ever, and no one else. If we get to get naked with more people more often and not lose our man? Wow. Getting to indulge our bisexual side without having to choose? That’s what I call having my cake and eating it too!
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