The profile of a girl I’m checking out online said she’s into primal fetish, and I have no idea what that means. Isn’t sex in general primal? Is this some kind of animal role play?
Are you confused when you see “primal fetish” in an online dating profile? Let’s discuss!
What Is Primal Kink?
You’ve heard of the paleo diet, sometimes called primal eating or the primal path. You skip unprocessed foods and eat more in tune with your animal nature. It sounds sensible and realistic—less junk, more fish and veggies—until you meet the radical paleo couple who invite you for dinner and serve you a chunk of raw liver.
The primal fetish is kind of like that. On the one hand, it is really quite natural, catering more to our basic instincts than to the improvised bells and whistles and props of kink. And on the other, yes, people might engage in animal play or do it outside in the wild or dress up like the Flintstones.
What Is Primal Sex Like?
Primal kink is sex that is wild, natural, and intense. The idea behind it is that we leave the trappings of society at the door and have sex the way we would if we were animals. It’s all about acting on instinct.
Essentially, primal play is sex that leaves behind social inhibitions and gets back to nature, entering a place where instinct and response follow impulse and desire.
Depending who’s playing, this might include the hunt, the chase, kicking and biting, violence, overpowering or capture, bodily fluids, wrestling, animal skins, the outdoors, props that range from skin rugs to antlers, vocalization like howling and growling and grunting.
Primal sex play is a kind of BDSM practice all about raw, brute, emotional and sexual instincts. Being primal means animalistic sex, fighting, hunting, and usually non-monogamy.
Primal sex is all about acting on instincts, and that might include acting when desire occurs rather than setting a particular date. It may involve terminology like wolf or wild or hunting. Primal sex often shuns the use of toys or modern props and prefers hair, nails, skin, and teeth, and wild acts like biting, scratching, pinning, howling, and hunting.
Read: My Lover Has a Vampire Fetish
Scent chemistry is an important part of the mate selection process for primal fetish.
The act of mounting, circling, wrestling, and the natural animalistic struggle for dominance are important aspects of primal sex.
Those who are into primal fetish resist grooming or hygiene practices that reject the human animal and encourage those that accentuate the natural. For example, natural body hair on a man would be left in place rather than manscaped. Natural sex scents are not overpowered or removed with fake chemical perfumes.
BDSM vs Primal Fetish
Lots of primal fetishists see their kink as a form of BDSM. There is a lot of power play, (consensual) violence, and intensity. Scratching, biting, hair pulling, and other expressions of intense desire are common.
However, many primal kink proponents reject the artificial constructs of BDSM and see their way as wild and natural. Factory-made outfits and paraphernalia or tools don’t work in this context. They view the primal fetish as being more about hunter or predator and prey than master and servant or dominant and submissive.
Primal purists prefer to use the body for constraint, restraint, and action, including biting, clawing, and pinning, than “artificial” bonds.
Are Women always the Prey?
Hell, no. Ever watch wild animal documentaries? It takes all kinds. While primal play acknowledges gender differences in physical and biological traits, as well as psychological, it is also brutally honest. Primal play acknowledges the power women have over men, rather than just lording it over the cavewomen and dragging them by the hair.
Nor is wild sex always heterosexual or heteronormative.
Read: 4 Types of Female-Led Relationships (FLR)
Primal Fetish and the Five Senses
Wild sex involves all five senses. While sensation play, BDSM, and sensual sex consider many senses, often one sense—touch, sight—are dominant, and some are rejected or forgotten. Primal play tries to recreate the true experience of sex in honor of our animal natures. So sound and smell—senses we often minimize in modern sex and many fetishes—are also important.
Read: How the 5 Senses Affect Our Kinks and Fetishes
Is Primal Play Pagan?
Essentially, primal kink is ritualistic, animalistic sex that celebrates our nature and nature itself. Like any sex practice, it can be spiritual or religious depending on an individual’s tradition and intention. Lots of kinks or ways to play are ceremonial. Primal sex is not in and of itself a religious tradition, pagan or otherwise, but you’ll see lots of profiles, posts, and information that portray it that way.
Historically, paganism included numerous nature cults that worshipped various aspects of nature, and included many rites that were sexual. Ancient goddess cults from Africa to Germany honored the earth and animals. So for pagans, primal sex may be a natural extension of their practices, and for ecologically minded spiritual folks, same thing.
But even though you see a lot of references to pagan spirituality with primal play, lots of people who love animalistic sex are not into that, or don’t combine their beliefs with their sex life.
Is Primal Play Safe Sex?
Depends. Wild sex or primal sex can and should be consensual, but it does engage with intensity and even violence. Scratching and hair pulling or biting should be negotiated within a consensual framework of intensity, and treated immediately with first aid if necessary, but all things considered, primal sex is just no-holds-barred sex.
Read: Implied consent or Expressed Consent?
Some primal sex advocates are extremists (or purists, depending how you look at it) and don’t believe in using condoms or contraception. This is one thing if you’re in a monogamous relationship and hoping for babies, and another if you aren’t, so act accordingly.
Once you have negotiated and consented, go for it! Get in touch with your inner caveman or wolf and see where passion takes you.
Read: Best Fetish Dating Sites For Every Kink
Do you engage in primal kink? Please share in the comments!
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