Erotic Spanking Tips: How to Spank Your Lover

Have you fantasized about erotic spanking? Do you think you would like to give a good spanking to your current partner or maybe someone new?

Sometimes there’s nothing like that feeling of helplessness, that adrenaline rush, that “good pain” a woman can experience at the hands of her lover.

Erotic Spanking Tips

Communication is what’s important when exploring new kinks. You can surely find someone online that is experienced in the art of spanking. But if it’s something you want to introduce to a current partner, here are some tips:

Introducing Erotic Spanking

Bring the subject up when talking about your desires. Feel out a reaction. Hopefully, you won’t hear. “No way, what the fuck?” That’s not a good sign. Playfully give her a light tap during  sex and gauge her reaction. Ground rules are good to set-up beforehand as bringing this up right before could spoil the mood.

A woman must feel safe before she can give up control. You must have her trust and equate the spanking with sexual pleasure.

Role playing is a great way to introduce spanking. This may dictate her position – over your lap, hands against the wall, bent over, or on the bed.

Read: 4 Over-the-Knee Spanking Roleplay Ideas

Women who like being spanked enjoy the vulnerability, the attention paid to her behind, and the anticipation of sexual pleasure to come.You may enjoy the feeling of control, the view, and the excitement of warming her up. Mix in gentle caresses and rubbing for variety.

Let her know how much you are enjoying yourself – your rock hard cock may not be enough.

All you need is your hand – a cupped palm with fingers together makes the best smacking sound and will redden the skin without excessive pain. A flat palm with relaxed fingers provides more of a sting that will cause blood to collect in her bottom and genitals – a physiological process of sexual arousal that is needed for orgasm to occur. This is similar to what happens psychologically when you kiss and caress her.

Keep the tempo slow and irregular to create more anticipation that will lead to her getting super aroused and very wet. Spanking should be seen as foreplay (in a roleplay) with the goal of orgasm for both partners. Some women can climax from spanking alone, but if you know your woman then you’ll know when it’s time to slide inside.

Take a look around your home. You’d be surprised what you might find in the kitchen or closet.

Read: Impact Play Tips, Tools, and Safety

Start Slow

Start slow should probably be the first words spoken to any newbie on the BDSM scene.

If you’re showing a close friend the basics of domination or submission, bondage or sadism and masochism, I will articulate only one thing: TELL THEM TO START SLOW!

The urge and exciting rush to unleash one’s inner leather-clad, ball-stomping, ass-kicker self might flood to the surface, and they may lose it.

I think that many people, if given the chance to administer pain to somebody who is in a prone, vulnerable position, may over-estimate the impact of their actions! Of course, there are also those gentle souls who, when in the position to dip their toes in the dark pools of BDSM, play extra gentle and smooth.

There’s not really any way to truly gauge how much power to damage one has when they wield a flogger, a crop or leather paddle, especially when introduced to another body to give pain to!

And that’s why it’s best to start with something like a nice little spanking. 

Enjoy and tell us about your spanking experience in the comments below.

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