What Is a Ball Gag?
A ball gag is a kind of gag, or device worn on, in, or over the mouth to prevent the person from speaking.
A ball gag is a rubber or silicone sphere or ball connected to a strap that is fixed around the head. The ball itself fits into the mouth behind the teeth.
The ball gag prevents someone from speaking clearly. Usually you can just grunt or moan. Someone wearing a ball gag will also drool a lot.
Read: 15 Types of BDSM Gags for Silence and Submission
What Is a Ball Gag Used For?
A ball gag is used during BDSM sessions, as part of the erotic power exchange relationship between a dominant and submissive. A ball gag is a kind of restraint in bondage, specifically used to restrain someone from being able to speak.
Ball gags have symbolic, aesthetic, and practical appeal in achieving domination and submission dynamics, in silencing the submissive’s speech, in punishment, humiliation, or degradation.
Read: All About Degradation Kink and How to Play
A ball gag is a symbol of submission because it removes the ability to speak legibly, thus reducing the slave’s autonomy and ability to protest or direct the action or respond to the circumstances. This can be important for the lover who enjoys the experience of erotic humiliation.
Many ball gag wearers report that it is powerful in transforming them from a person into an object, and this helps liberate them physically and psychologically to their whole sexual identity. Conversely, some submissives report that they find it empowering to consensually wear ball gags, muzzles, or other gags—things that were used historically to silence prisoners or abducted persons, degrade slaves, or keep wild animals in check.
Drooling is a natural response to wearing a ball gag and this adds to the helpless, vulnerable, degraded and humiliated aspect of bondage.
Read: Humiliation Kink: 18 Examples of Erotic Embarrassment
Sensory deprivation is very erotic as well for many people, and using a ball gag has been reported to enhance erotic sensations.
It is also exciting for the dominant lover to add another element of control and command over their partner, such as when and if they can speak. For many, it is an important part of the complete aesthetic.
Many dominants are aroused by both the practical and ornamental aspects of seeing their submissive lover in various BDSM gear, from harnesses to collar to handcuffs to ball gags.
Read: BDSM Toys: 24 BDSM Gear and Equipment Ideas
How to Use a Ball Gag
Discuss Boundaries First
While ball gags are common in BDSM scenes, not everyone who is either dominant or submissive in nature enjoys ball gag play. It’s important to discuss your desires, fantasies, and what a particular kind of bondage or sadomasochism looks like to you, and whether that gels with the needs of your lover, or if you are both willing to experiment and play with this kind of bondage.
Draw clear boundaries before using a ball gag, and explore your desires together from those confines first.
Read: BDSM Limits and Boundaries to Discuss
Consent Is Always Imperative
As they often say, consent is crucial in BDSM—without consent, it isn’t kink, it’s something else. This is true with every aspect of the power exchange relationship. Someone may agree to be your slave, or to not speaking, or to torture, and still decide they don’t want to wear a ball gag.
Read: Should Sexual Consent be Implied or Expressed?
Trust Is Key
Trust is the bedrock of a beautiful BDSM session, and the best way to establish trust is to fully respect boundaries and consent. This includes the boundaries drawn in relation to using a ball gag or any other toys or acts.
Read: How to Build Trust in Your Kinky Relationships
Start with a Smaller Ball Gag
Wearing a small ball gag is the best way for a submissive to get used to the feeling of it.
Be Aware of Medical or Respiratory Issues
As some kidnappers find out, you can suffocate someone without intending to fairly easily. Duct tape across both nose and mouth is obviously deadly. But if someone can’t breathe out of their nostrils, obstructing the airways to their throat with a ball gag can have lethal effects.
The gag reflect is strong in some people who can barely brush their teeth, never mind use a giant ball gag. Others have asthma and may have an asthma attack under duress. Be attentive and aware.
Read: RACK, PRICK, and Other BDSM Safety Protocols
Switch to other Gag Styles
If a ball gag doesn’t work for someone, there are lots of other kinds of gags that may feel more comfortable or safe. Bit gags and muzzles can be just as erotic but work better for certain individuals or as a matter of preference.
Have a Time Limit
Deciding on a time limit before putting on a ball gag is a great way to enjoy using one while respecting boundaries and comfort limits.
Read: 5 Domination and Submission Games to Play
Consider a Breathable Ball Gag
Some ball gags are designed with breathability in mind. Using a breathable ball gag means less pressure and responsibility from the dominant lover and more comfort and less anxiety for the submissive one.
Read: How to Be a Good Dom (or Domme) for Your Sub
Embrace the Drooling
Ball gags make you drool. This can be an important aspect of erotic humiliation. Even if you don’t enjoy regular ball gag play, the experience of drooling can be memorable. Some people have a fetish for saliva and wearing a ball gag is one way to guarantee lots of it!
Read: Spit Fetish: Salivating Over Saliva
Pair with a Blindfold, Ball Gag, and Bondage
A ball gag is usually part of a scene with many more elements or components of bondage. Some people use ball gags alone, but more often, they are part of a more elaborate bondage scene. Experiment with layers of sensory deprivation, such as a blindfold, handcuffs or wrist restraints, rope bondage, etc.
Mix in Impact Play
A ball gag during serious spanking, paddling, caning, and whipping can intensify the experience for the wearer and the dominant partner.
Read: Impact Play Tips, Tools, and Safety
Try Sensation Play with a Ball Gag
Sensation play can be part of the bondage, exploring the use of different kinds of feelings such as hot and cold, textures, nipple clamping, tickling, and more.
Read: Sensation Play Tips, Tools, and Ideas
Have a Safety Signal
Safe words aren’t the best way to communicate when you can’t speak! Ball gag lovers usually use a gesture or signal. Make sure to pick something the sub can use, and make sure the dom/me is always looking for it. Don’t use an arm wave for example if the person is undergoing mummification.
Read: BDSM Hand Signals and When To Use Them
Keep Your Ball Gags Clean
Aside from breathing concerns, the most common issues around ball gags are sanitary ones. Clean your ball gag according to the manufacturer’s instructions. Don’t swap gags between different lovers without first cleaning, unless they are already kissing and agree to that fluid exchange. Wash before and after using.
Are ball gags a part of your BDSM relationship and/or play? Do tell!
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