Where do you fit in when it comes to BDSM roles? What kinky roles in BDSM describe you?
Maybe you aren’t yet sure what all the BDSM roles are, or what they mean. Here’s a master list of roles in BDSM that you can keep handy. Some of these BDSM roles will overlap or apply to more than one category.
33 Roles in BDSM
1. Submissive / Sub
The submissive or sub is a very common BDSM role, and is the person who takes the subordinate or submissive role in a consensual power exchange, either sexually or in a relationship.
2. Dominant / Dom(me)
The dominant or Dom or Domme is the dominant partner in a power exchange relationship or sexual encounter. They take charge and control of different areas of sex and the relationship as defined by consensual agreement with the submissive or sub.
3. Master / Mistress
A Master or Mistress is also a dominant or Dom/me, that is, they are the partner in charge in a power exchange dynamic. It is a matter of preference whether a BDSM role couple wants to call themselves “master and slave” or “dominant and submissive.”
Read: How to Find a BDSM Slave or Master
4. Slave
The slave is the submissive BDSM role, with a more extreme context implied. Slave and sub can be used interchangeably, but some have a strong preference away from the politically charged term “slave” and some prefer the word slave because they identify that way and find it more descriptive.
Read: 10 Ways to Be a Good Femdom Slave
5. Top
This BDSM role refers to the active partner—the one who does something to the other partner.
A BDSM top can be interchangeable with dominant or master, or it can be milder and refer to a person who controls the action. For example, the penetrating partner may be called the top, even if it isn’t an S & M power exchange.
6. Bottom
The bottom is a role in BDSM that means the one receiving the action. For example, a male who prefers to receive anal sex rather than do the penetrating. Bottom can refer to a submissive but is not necessarily about power exchange dynamics.
Read: Topping from the Bottom: What It Means
7. Switch
The BDSM switch is a person who enjoys topping, or taking it from the bottom, equally.
Read: Switching from Dominant to Submissive
8. Sadist
The sadist can be a top, a dominant, or a master, but not all tops are into sadism. The sadist enjoys administering emotional and physical pain, either because they are sexually aroused and excited by it, or because they enjoy giving a masochist or slave the pleasure they crave.
9. Masochist
The masochist is the reverse of the sadist, the one who enjoys receiving physical or psychological pain.
Read: Best S&M Dating Sites for Sado-Masochism
10. Femdom
Femdom stands for female domination. A femdom takes sexual and relationship authority over a submissive male.
11. Dominatrix
A dominatrix is also a female dominant. This term usually implies classic BDSM clothing and paraphernalia, black leather and latex, corsets, etc, and a dungeon.
A dominatrix is usually a pro, where we might call someone in a similar BDSM role a domme or femdom. This is not hard and fast, of course, but we usually see this term used for professional sex worker or BDSM services.
Read: Dominatrix Guide: How to Become a Dominatrix
12. Rigger
The rigger is a BDSM role for the dominant partner in rope bondage. The rigger is the one who applies rope bondage, artistically or functionally, to the submissive.
Read: BDSM Rigger Tips: Getting Started with Rigger Kink
13. Rope Bunny
The rope bunny is the rigger’s or the rope artist’s submissive partner who enjoys having rope bondage performed on them.
Read: What Is a Rope Bunny and How Can You Meet One?
14. Brat
A brat is a submissive BDSM role, and refers to a personality type or play type who enjoys breaking rules, antagonizing, and being rebellious. It is a playful kind of BDSM submissive.
The brat may enjoy “teenage” habits and dress styles, and need guidance and discipline. The brat is mischievous, a smart aleck, mouthy, and craves a lot of attention.
Read: Brat BDSM and the Brat Kink Explained
15. Brat Tamer
The brat tamer is a dominant BDSM role, the counterpart to the brat submissive. Their role is to give the brat what they need and control them in a loving, disciplining way.
16. Domestic Servant
The domestic servant is a role in BDSM where a submissive wants to act as a maid or butler to their dominant. They may enjoy domestic service activities such as doing dishes, mowing the lawn, or vacuuming.
17. Sissy
The sissy is a type of submissive to a femdom or female dominant, who is sexually excited by feminization or sissification.
The sissy may want to be dressed in little girl clothes, subject to small penis humiliation, spanked, forced to wear diapers and ponytails, made to wear makeup, and receive pegging from a femdom in a strap-on.
18. Findomme / Financial Dom
Financial domination is a form of BDSM using finance. The findomme or financial dom is a dominant who demands money from his or her subordinates. She often does nothing in return for her payments except indulge in the lifestyle her pay pigs feel she deserves.
Read: Findoms and Financial Domination Relationships
19. Pay Pig
The pay pig is the submissive to the findomme. He gives his findomme money, sometimes all of his money. Some pay pigs work entirely to pay a findomme, and in this form of BDSM relationship, very often there is no sexual exchange or even in-person meetings. The pay pig is sometimes called a human ATM machine.
20. Daddy Dom
The Daddy Dom takes on a paternal role to an adult little girl submissive (or adult little boy sub). He controls and leads through discipline, affection, punishment, and nurture, such as snuggling, helping, explaining, using time outs or grounding as fatherly forms of discipline.
Read: Introduction to Daddy Doms and DDLG Relationships
21. Mommy Dom
The Mommy Dom is a dominant BDSM role who acts as mother, using female authority, nurture, discipline, affection, and guidance to help her little girl or little boy submissive. There are many BDSM mommy fetishes and kinks.
22. Little
A little is an adult who enjoys regressing psychologically and physically to a little age, and is often submissive to a daddy dom or mommy dom.
Read: Littles and Little Space: An Introduction
23. Adult Baby
An adult baby regresses past childhood down to infancy. They are submissive and enjoy acting helpless, playing, being diapered, sucking a bottle, and using baby toys.
24. Pet
A submissive, companionable role in BDSM is the pet. The pet may like to play as pony, kitten, or bunny. The pet may enjoy light role play or be quite submissive and serious, such as eating from a dog dish and walking on all fours, using a newspaper to relieve themselves.
Read: Pet Play: All About Animal Roleplay
25. Owner
An owner can refer to a pet owner or a slave owner.
26. Pony
Pony play is a very popular BDSM kink, and the pony is usually a submissive and sometimes a showy role, complete with tack, gear, hoofs, tails, masks, and jumping rings.
27. Furry
A furry can be someone who enjoys cosplay, dressing up as anthropomorphic characters. A subset of the furry culture is kinky, and derives sexual excitement from dressing up, from the plush costume, or from BDSM play with other furries.
Read: Sexual Furries and the Language of Furry Sex
28. Predator
In primal play, the predator or hunter is the dominant BDSM role.
29. Prey
The prey is the submissive role, or preyed upon. Primal kink is not as cut and dried as classic BDSM roles, as they derive their inspiration from the wild and from animal roles. The female may be submissive prey, but she is also the queen bee.
30. Cuckold / Cuckquean
The cuckold or his female parallel, the cuckquean, are submissives who enjoy the erotic humiliation of their partner taking other lovers.
Read: How to Find Cuckold Couples & Bulls Online
31. Hotwife
A hotwife is a dominant woman who is hot and has many suitors and admirers. Hotwifing implies a male partner who is monogamous to her while she takes many lovers. The male gets off imagining her seducing and sleeping with other men.
32. Stag
While the cuckold enjoys the humiliation of not being able to satisfy his wife, and imagining the sex she has with more virile men, the stag is totally satisfied by his hotwife, secure and confident. He does not need other women but gets off at how her libido extends to other males.
Read: All About Stag and Vixen Relationships
33. Bull
A hotwife’s lover is called a bull, whether her husband is a cuckold or a stag.
What BDSM role do you identify with? Or is there more than one role? Do tell.
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